Cultivating A Marriage
I have always considered myself a patient person, largely in part to five years of living in Memphis. And now that I am a wife of seven weeks, the joy of gaining a husband comes with the added bonus of a non-existing landscape.
Eager to pack away the bitter memories of lake effect snow, I planned my flower beds with the angst of a tortured artist hellbent on pefection: gladiolus by the side fence in my favorite hue of yellow, vibrant ground cover to radiate in front of the rear backyard fence and ornamental grass lining the driveway whose waving blades dance like a frantic audience at a Beyoncé concert. And right in the midst of this colorblocked tapestry, the scattering of majestic flower seeds would be sown instead of the cookie-cutter flowers found in my local garden centers.
Once I mapped out where plants would be situated according to height (and bloom time), I sprinkled, watered and waited for the process to begin…
Not so fast. The purple fountain grass planted last spring is resisting new shoots. The black and white cutting garden concept went by the wayside, thanks to the no-show seedlings of 50+ Penny Black seeds. Plan B had me planting vivid salvia, coleus and reliable pansies. From the local garden centers.
It seems germination of a flower cannot be rushed, skipped or altered. Just like marriage. Even when there is no sign of your hard work, one must be steadfast in faith that the reward will happen in its proper season. And when the first signs of growth appear, one must be prepared for unexpected arrivals whose only mission is to disrupt the seeds you have planted.
Being a newbie wife is just as exhilarating as awaiting blossoms within my newly-planted flower beds. I find it can be frustrating at times, blissful in unexpected moments and brings just as much happiness on rainy days as sun-kissed ones. All of which could easily happen within a 24-hour period.
What I am learning about marriage goes hand-in-hand with my garden: I must cultivate the appropriate foundation for love to take root, doing irregular maintenance can never be an option and weeding out invasive pests is crucial. What makes both my marriage and my garden continue to evolve is knowing that the beauty created today is only the beginning of years to come.
Tears have always watered my prayers. And now that I have married my soul mate (who happens to be my childhood sweetheart from 32 years ago), I water the budding palette outside of our home with tears of joy.
After all, H. Jackson Brown, Jr. said it best:
Remember that children, marriages and flower gardens reflect the kind of care they get.