Featured in Munaluchi Bridal Magazine, Issue No. 27, Jessica & Chris’s 3-day Nigerian wedding celebration honors tradition while embracing New York City sophistication and Southern flair.
When Jessica first came across Chris’s dating profile on Hinge, her first thought was: “this profile isn’t that interesting, but this guy otherwise seems like my type, so what’s the harm in saying hello?” Chris actually thought Jessica’s profile was SO beautiful that maybe she wasn’t even real. Luckily, Jessica was (and is) just that beautiful and absolutely real! They matched, started talking, and soon formed an unbreakable bond in real life.
Their love grew infinitely from there until one day Chris decided it was time for the next step. On a trip to Mexico celebrating their 18th month anniversary and Chris’s birthday, he secretly rented out an entire beachfront at the Rosewood Mayakoba resort. When Jessica arrived for their intimate candlelit dinner, she was surprised with champagne and a love letter delivered by a private butler. As she read the letter, Chirs got down on both needs, saying, “A king cannot be without his queen.” Needless to say, she said “Yes!”.
Fast forward to their Nigerian wedding, they brought 75 guests from the United States to Abuji, Nigeria for a three-day wedding celebration. In total, approximately 200 guests attended their wedding! Over the course of three days, guests experienced four events including an Introduction Ceremony, Welcome Dinner, a Traditional Nigerian Wedding, and a Western wedding. With seven outfit changes from the bride and groom and eleven live performances, it was truly the wedding of their dreams!
More details on their love story below.
- Couple: Jessica O. Matthews & Christopher D. Stewart
- Occupations: Jessica is the Founder & CEO of Uncharted. Christopher is the Vice President & Assistant General Counsel of AIG Investments
Quick Facts:
- Wedding date: May 26th – 28th, 2022
- Wedding location: Abuja, Nigeria
- Theme: Nigerian wedding with NYC sophistication and Southern (Mississippi and Texas) flair.
- Gifts for your bridesmaids/groomsmen: Custom Ankara robes and slippers.
- Gifts for one another: groom surprised bride after secretly taking singing lessons for months with a serenade; bride featured excerpts advice from texts she had with groom’s deceased mother in her vows as a way to have her “voice” at the ceremony.
- Ceremony entrance song: Best Friend by Saweetie & Doja Cat
- First dance song: Tell Him by Lauren Hill
How they met…
We met on Hinge (a dating app in the USA).
JESS: Haha, this sounds horrible, but the first thing I thought when I saw his profile was “this profile isn’t that interesting, but this guy otherwise seems like my type, so what’s the harm in saying hello?” I have a soft spot for nerdy jocks, lol.
CHRIS: I thought you weren’t real and you were something like a Tinder bot. I honestly thought you were too beautiful to be a real person, especially when you contacted me first. (Thank God you hit me up first because I probably would have said something stupid if I said “hi” first.)
The proposal…
It was meant to be a birthday trip for Chris/18-month anniversary trip for the couple (but was mostly a much-needed vacation during the thick of the pandemic (September 2020)).
Chris reserved the entire beachfront at the Rosewood Mayakoba in Mexico. A single table, adorned with tropical flowers and decor, was set by the shore. The sand had the words “LOVE” written large across it with small lanterns and torches lighting a path. Jessica arrived at sunset for “the anniversary dinner” — surprised to see that they had the entire beach to themselves. Chris had “Keys To The Kingdom” from the Black is King album playing on repeat in the background. A personal butler prepared to serve a multi-course dinner. Chris asked the butler to bring the first course and the butler places a tray with a statue and envelope in front of Jessica. The statue was a miniature bronze bust of an Esan queen (Jessica’s tribe in Nigeria).
Chris then says, “A king cannot be a king without his queen” and got down on both knees. He asks her to read the letter, which includes his profession to love her. A select African proverb from the letter: “A happy man marries the woman he loves. A happier man loves the woman he marries.” Needless to say, she said “Yes!”.
Western Wedding Highlights:
- Nigerian band transformed into a Southern choir.
- Groom’s half brother was the pastor.
- Groom walked down aisle with picture of mother who passed away unexpectedly only 4 months prior while choir sang ‘Never Would Have Made It” by Marvin Sapp
- Bride walked down aisle to choir singing chorus of “International Player’s Anthem” by UGK.
Reception Highlights:
- Guests experienced “Bridgerton in Nigeria” during the cocktail hour with a live string quartet performing contemporary songs like Kiss from a Rose by Seal.
- Parents of Bride brought down the house, entering reception dancing to “California Love” by Tupac & Dr. Dre.
- Bride & Groom entered reception dancing to “Best Friend” by Saweetie & Doja Cat.
- Groom serenaded bride, singing “More Than A Woman” by Calvin Harris.
- Performance by the winner of The Voice Nigeria (season 3), Esther Beneyeogo.
- Live dance performance choreographed in the style of the main dance scene in the first Coming to America.
After-Party Highlights:
- Same location, different lighting. Theme of afterparty was “CHESSCHELLA” — an ode to the groom’s Houston roots with their take on Beyonce’s famous Coachella performance.
- Bride & Groom re-entered hall with a 15-piece marching band and 7 majorettes.
- Popcorn bar and candy bar.
Best wedding day memories…
Walking down the stairs for the Introduction was the most emotional and powerful part of the experience. It is such a deeply cultural rite of passage. I fought back tears. My father cried so much he needed to wear sunglasses for most of the day. Other great memories were getting to enjoy the live band at the Welcome Dinner with just Chris before everyone arrived, Dancing to “Best Friend” by Saweetie/Doja Cat while entering the Western Reception, the performance from Esther Beneyeogo was AMAZING, and hearing everyone in the church singing “Brighter Day” with the choir right before I walked in.
Cultural elements…
The Introduction & Traditional Wedding featured all of the traditional Esan bride customs, while the Western Ceremony heavily featured a Southern Choir.
The Introduction…
During the Introduction, the two families meet and formally agree to the future marriage of the bride and groom. This is a common tradition in many African cultures, but is predominant in the traditions of the Edo state tribes in Nigeria (the home state of the bride’s family). After exchanging greetings, the families will be seated on opposite sides of the room. The bride’s family will present the groom’s family with kola nuts and drinks to welcome them. It is unrushed: kola nuts will be broken and eaten.
Then the groom’s family spokesman will stand and declare the purpose of their visit: for the groom to seek the bride-to-be’s hand in marriage. The spokesman of the groom’s family will then present gifts to the bride’s family. The bride’s father or his representative will then call the intended bride-to-be and ask if she knows the groom and his family. He will inform her of the proposal and asks if he should accept the gifts, i.e. if she wants to marry the groom. If she says “no”, there will be no wedding! If she says “yes”, joy! The bride’s family will now accept the proposal and give the groom a list of items to bring to the Traditional Wedding ceremony (the “bride price”).
Traditional wedding attire…
Coral Beads: One of the main themes in a traditional Edo State wedding is the infusion of coral beads. The bride is adorned with coral beads (ivie) and crowned with a coral beaded headpiece (okuku). The groom and bridesmaids will be adorned with coral bead jewelry, as well.
Payment of a Bride Price…Sort Of: In the Edo culture, it is customary to ask for an almost comically low bride price so the funds can easily be returned if the groom does not cherish the bride for his entire life.
The Groom Will Be Tested: To demonstrate that he deserves the bride’s hand in marriage, the groom will be tested mentally, physically, and financially throughout the ceremony. Sometimes his groomspeople are expected to join him!
Entertainment: Guests enjoyed traditional Edo women “Okuku” dancers, Edo warrior dance performances, and a live band from Esan.
Multiple Outfit Changes: While guests are not expected to change their clothes, it is customary for the bride and groom to have three to four outfit changes!
Advice for other engaged couples…
This will be more stressful than you can imagine, but don’t worry, everything always works out. Somehow, we processed 75+ visas in 3 days and had a successful wedding during a pandemic in Nigeria battling the good, bad, and ugly of bringing together so many different types of people and cultures. It always works out.
Looking for more Nigerian wedding celebration inspiration?
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Vendors:
- Photographer: Bedge Pictures
- Videographer: Kole Films
- Makeup Artist: Jide Of St.Ola
- Hair: Hair By Ehis
- Decor: Alveena Decor & Monarch Designs
- Event Planner: Exquisite Luxury Events
- Band: Jojo Band
- Ogenete Dance Group: Uromi
- Akhere Band: Emperor Wadada
- Edo Culturual Dance Group: Linda Usman
- Okuku Hairstylist: Abhasowoma Madojemu Roseline
- Voice coach: C. Anthony Bryant
- MC: MC Frank
- Tourism & Logistics: Motley Travels and Logistics
- Wedding Bouquet: The Flower Shop by LC
- Entertainment: Frenzy Band, DJ Eyebee, Esther Bonyeogo. Adila Dance Acrobatic, & String Tribe
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