Kevin and Melissa Fredericks on Celebrating 20 Years of Marriage

Known by their beloved fans as Mr. and Mrs. KevOnStage, our featured cover couple, Kevin and Melissa Fredericks, are the funniest most genuine pairing we know!

The couple is recognized for their individual accolades and shared accomplishments. 

Kevin is an Actor, Comedian, Filmmaker, Director, Speaker, Content Creator, and Influencer known for his roles in No Good Men (2008), The Family Exchange (2015), and Major Deal (2016). He also started his streaming service, KevOnStage Studios, which unapologetically celebrates Black-owned content and digital creators across the Black community and was most recently announced as the new Co-Host of TBS’s ‘Friday Night Vibes’ Revival with Nina Parker airing on Jan. 5 at 8:00 pm ET/PT. (Oh, and I forgot to mention he has over 1.7 million followers on Instagram!). 

Melissa’s portfolio is equally expansive. As a Digital Content Creator, Author of the self-help book, The Journey to Self-Love, and Influencer, she is known for her advocacy of self-love and acceptance. Her open and honest dialogue about her journey of self-discovery and learning to love herself fully has helped her cultivate a community of dedicated fans. She has inspired countless women to embrace their inner beauty and lead confident, fulfilling lives. 

Together, Kevin and Melissa are the parents of two boys (their pride and joy!) and are a successful couple in business with multiple media platforms including The Love Hour Podcast and Keep Your Distance Comedy. In 2022, they even wrote a New York Times Bestseller called (in typical, totally honest, KevOnStage fashion): Marriage Be Hard. 

The established power couple, who have been married for almost 20 years, first met in their 11th-grade history class. 

“Miss Chapman’s US history class,” Kevin recalls, smiling. “I saw Melissa in the back of the room. She was gorgeous and beautiful.”

He decided to pass her a note, but as if straight out of a romantic comedy, Kevin’s attempt to share his feelings didn’t go as planned. 

“As I was writing, another young man tapped me and was like, “Can you hand this note to her?” I did. I was sad. But then she read it and didn’t look up at him, and I thought, “I have a chance”.”

He did have a chance. But, he decided to keep the note and pursued Melissa as a friend first instead. 

At the time, Melissa’s first impression of her now hubby was a bit different. She shares, “My first impression of Kev was that he was extremely likable but Kev didn’t know what he wanted in a woman.”

“I was so churchy,” she adds, laughing. “I used a church phrase. He was a ‘fisher of men.’ That’s what I used to call him because he was just liking whatever girl would give him the time of day.” 

However, soon their initial friendship blossomed into something undeniably deeper and they started dating. 

Twenty-three years ago, in the year 2000, they went on their first date.

“Our first date was at the Dollar Movies,” Melissa shares. “We lived on a military base, and they would have $1 Thursdays. So we went with a group of friends to see Gladiator.”

That first date led to many more. They were inseparable: laughing, loving, and enjoying life together. It didn’t take long for them each to realize they had found “the one.”

Keven recalls, “We were dating in college. I was an Air Force ROTC, everybody was talking about where their duty stations were going to be, and I remember thinking, “I don’t care where I get stationed or what job I do, as long as I’m with Melissa, I’ll be happy.” Then I thought, “I should marry her if I feel this way.” That’s when I knew she was the one.”

Melissa realized Kevin was “the one” while deciding if she wanted to be a lawyer. She ultimately changed the trajectory of her career path for the future of their relationship.

She shares, “I took this class literally on the LSATs and how to prepare for law school. The professor was saying how the majority of law students have high divorce rates, even when they go into practicing law, because of the hours and the stress. I was like, “Oh God. I don’t want to go into a field that’s already predetermined…”. At the time, it felt like it was predetermined that I was going to be divorced. I think that career change, and how I felt how serious we were at the time, those two things combined, I decided not to do that anymore.”

Of course, being with the love of her life made the decision worth it and Kevin proposed on Easter Sunday during their sophomore year of college. 

Melissa admits she was “totally surprised.” 

“He was there talking about how God loves the church so much, that he sacrificed himself, something along those lines,” she says, smiling. “He called me up and then my two sisters and two friends came out and they each had a sign, “Will you marry me?” I was completely shocked. I should have known, though, because it was Easter Sunday and my mom and my first lady were trying to get me to buy a new outfit for Easter, and I was so churchy, that I was like, “This is about Easter and God. Why are we worried about clothes? I don’t need new clothes.”

If she could do it over again, she might have worn a different outfit for the proposal, but Melissa wouldn’t have changed her answer! She happily said “Yes!” and slipped on the ring. 

Young, in love, and without much money in his pocket, Kevin admits, “It was a $99 ring. No tax. It was literally $99.” 

The price tag didn’t matter to Melissa, though. Not one bit. 

“It was a little single solitary ring,” she recalls, fondly. “I loved that ring. I had that ring for a long time.” 

The couple wed on June 26th, 2004, in an intimate ceremony in Washington state.

“Our colors were lavender and silver,” Melissa shares. “There wasn’t a theme. It was a great day. All in all, living in Washington state and getting a sunny day, even in June, is low-key kind of rare. All of our friends were there. We had friends from high school, friends from college, friends from our church that showed up, and then family, of course.”

While their first wedding was beautiful, key people were missing from their first special day. 

Melissa reveals, “We got married in 2004, so this is after the 9/11 attacks, and both of our dads were in the military and they were both called to duty. My dad didn’t get a chance to walk me down the aisle, and Kevin’s dad was not present at the wedding.”

This leads us to the present day, and the couple’s decision to host their grand destination vow renewal in Mexico next year!

Melissa and Kevin celebrated the beginning of their Road to Renewal with a luxurious photo shoot on Tuesday, October 17th, 2023, at the Malibu Garden Estate in Malibu California. Their creative team included planning by CM Events and Design, florals by Hidden Garden Florals, photography by Coterie member REEM Photography, and videography by Unleashed Vizuals.

Posing before breathtaking Malibu landscapes, Melissa and Kevin looked equal parts chic and sexy in their outfits which were expertly styled by GG&Co. Melissa’s short hairstyle was elevated with soft waves by Greg Gilmore and completed with classic glam makeup by Darien Isaac. 

The resulting photos are a joyous display of their love and affection for each other.

Ultimately, Melissa and Kevin’s playful banter paired with real talk about marriage, raising children, and topics they’re passionate about (such as celebrating and highlighting the Black community), have catapulted them into our hearts.

With so many exciting things going on for these two, we couldn’t pass on the opportunity to chat. And with Kevin and Melissa’s upcoming destination vow renewal, we literally couldn’t resist!

So sit back, relax, and prepare to laugh out loud as we get the inside scoop from Mr. and Mrs. KevOnStage on everything from who’s funnier (yes, we went there!), how they navigate marriage and business today, and their exciting Road to Renewal! 

When you first met, who was funnier?

Kevin: I was funnier.

Melissa: I was definitely funnier.

Kevin: Melissa didn’t even get funny until she met me.

Melissa: I was secretly funny.

Kevin: She never even made a joke until she started dating me.

Melissa: I was secretly funny but back then nobody knew.

Being married for almost 20 years now, what’s your secret to a long-lasting, healthy marriage? How do you guys keep your relationship fresh and spicy? 

Kevin: We use this analogy a lot, but Melissa came up with it about how cell phones work. 

If you have an iPhone, every year, every couple of months, there’s some changes to the software or the hardware, and you’re constantly learning and adapting to it. No headphone jack, USB-C, this button on the side no longer exists, whatever. You constantly are learning and changing with it.

Year to year, it doesn’t seem like a lot of change but if you went from the iPhone 4 to the iPhone 14, it’d be a lot of changes between the phone and the app, and marriage is very similar in that way.

To have a happy, healthy marriage, you’re going to constantly be loving a person that’s changing and they’ll be loving you while you’re changing, and that means constant communication, conversation, and simple things like I used to hate salmon and avocados and now I like them. Melissa went from very forward and strong to, “Okay, I should take a backseat because that’s what the church taught me,” to actually, “I am going to take up all my space again,” and loving her through those changes.

Then there are physical changes to the body or health and going from having no kids to one kid to two kids to two kids who need a lot of help, because they’re young, to two kids who are in high school, who don’t need that much help.

There’s all those constant changes that you have to be doing, and I think that being in love with the current version of your spouse is what keeps things spicy and fresh and current.

I think a lot of couples after many years just decide they no longer want to do the work, and that’s why they don’t be married no more.

You guys are the ultimate power couple. As a couple in business and on multiple platforms, including the Love Hour Podcast and Keep Your Distance Comedy, how do you navigate being in a romantic and business relationship?

Kevin: I think we’re still learning how to do that.

Melissa: It’s underrated how difficult it is to partner with your spouse in both business and, obviously, romance.

Kevin: A friend of ours used this analogy and it helps. One is a producer and the other is a singer and the producer was fussing at the singer. She was like, “It’s hard when your producer is also your husband because both of those entities are in one body, so when you’re frustrated at your producer when you guys go home, that’s still your husband, but that frustration is still there.”

I think for Melissa and I, we are partners and we’re also business partners and coworkers. Carrying or not carrying work frustration into actual frustration is hard. I think for us the thing we’re currently working on the most is just communication, especially me. Communication, communication, over-communication, in life, overall, and, hopefully, that passes into business and makes it easier.

To Melissa’s point, it is very underrated how difficult it can be, because most people go to work and they come home and talk about their day. We experience a lot of our same day together.

Melissa: If I had any advice to add to what Kev was just talking about, it’s definitely, A, communicate but I think, B, it’s also taking care and consideration and the words that you say and allowing the flexibility and rapport to be offering an opinion but also offering one that still is with care and concern, because at the end of the day, that is still your spouse and your partner.

The reality is we really should be doing that at work anyway.

Kevin: Yes.

Melissa: We just take for granted the fact that we’re talking to maybe a subordinate, and so you may not take as much care and concern, but, if we practiced it all the time, it would be much easier with your partner.

What were your biggest struggles in the process of working together? 

Kevin: In this line of business, most of the people that worked with me worked for me. There wasn’t usually a person who was my equal in the same job title.

When Melissa and I began to work together, there were moments of learning how to talk to your wife who is also your partner but not your subordinate. I just come across as very direct, because usually people ask me a question, and I give them the answer.

But when your wife is asking that question, and that answer is given without softness and kindness, can be too harsh whereas your employee can be like, “I hate my boss,” but they don’t have to like you for them to do a good job. Your spouse actually has to like you.

Learning how to take more care with that and be more understanding, caring, and showing more concern, than I had to with people who just reported to me, but I didn’t see them after work. It’s just a different dynamic.

What is your proudest accomplishment so far?

Melissa: Writing our book, Marriage Be Hard, together.

Kevin: And being a New York Times best-seller. That’s our proudest accomplishment.

Whose idea was it to write the book?

Melissa: Kev was presented with the opportunity to write a book, and he wanted to do a book that we did together as his first one.

Was it difficult to evaluate your marriage, dissect it, and have an open and honest dialogue about the good and the bad, and then write it all out and share it in the book?

Melissa: Honestly, in a lot of ways, the book is a compilation of the highlights from the Love Hour Podcast. I feel like it’s just a way for everyone to get a lot of the really great information we offered in the podcast over the years in one central location.

In that regard, no, I don’t think it was difficult. However, even though, a lot of the stuff or some of the stuff was information we’d either shared before or thought about before, for whatever reason, writing the book was a more therapeutic process than the podcast.

Kevin: I was going to say that. There’s some stuff that we hadn’t reached back and talked about for years, that wasn’t necessarily healed, it was just buried, and to write the book, we had to uncover it and deal with it … Sometimes we would go to therapy and that week’s topic would be whatever we were dealing with with the book, because we realized it was unfinished.

Melissa: Yeah.

Kevin: I think we came out more healed on the other side as a result of writing the book.

Together, you’re a force on social media. What’s your favorite part about making content together?

Kevin: I think people don’t understand how funny and creative Melissa is, so when we do our creative couple videos, more often than not, those are her ideas. Seeing those go crazy, for me, is very fulfilling, because-

Melissa: For me too.

Kevin: … I just be like, “Thank, y’all.” I think I get the credit for being funny, but Melissa is very funny and very creative and studies social media, at least, as much as I do, if not more, because she’s aware of my industry, plus other industries where I’m usually not as aware of other industries.

Melissa: I really do enjoy being able to make the content together and when they do well, whether it’s my idea or his, to be honest, it doesn’t matter but because we do so many things, we actually don’t do a lot of things together. I think whenever we do something together, it allows us to shine together. I feel really good and warm and fuzzy.

How do you balance your personalities and creative energy?

Kevin: I don’t know if we balance our personalities. I think we leave space for our ‘persons-alities.’

Melissa: Yeah. I think I know what you mean.

Kevin: I think Melissa knows who I am, and she allows me to be who I am, and I allow her to be who she is. I think we’re just different people living life together. And we leave room for each other and honor our differences. That’s what makes us a good team because we have different skills.

On your road to renewal this year, what do you envision for your second walk down the aisle?

Melissa: For me, first and foremost, there are two goals I would say when it comes to the vow renewal. The first one is that our families will be present, so that’s a non-negotiable for me. My dad and Kevin’s dad and, of course, everyone else, but those are non-negotiables. I’m not doing this again, a third time, a fourth time. I’m not doing it again.

For me, this one is the one that I really do want all of our family present. I know it’s already been 20 years but I do want all of our family present, probably because I’m also doing a destination vow renewal, and so I want the togetherness of the family, I want the memories to be made, I want … A lot of them haven’t been to a resort. This will be their first time in Mexico. There are so many things we’re going to be experiencing together. It’s really important for me that my family is there. That’s the number one.

But number two, I want lux, I want romance, I want fun, I want it to be just a great time for everyone present. Yeah. I’m envisioning a lot. I don’t have a vision for my dress, though, oddly enough. I feel like I’ve concentrated on the space, itself, and for whatever reason, I have not zoned into how I want to look. 

That’s not top of mind as much as I know I don’t want bridesmaids, for example, I know I don’t want my husband to have groomsmen. I’ve decided everyone in attendance will be part of the wedding party, and so they’ll all be color-coordinated, instead of standing next to us.

I think … Not I think. I know I want my boys up there. I know I want a lot of greenery and a lot of roses and a lot of very romantic colors. But what I will actually look like, I don’t know yet.

Why do you think it’s important to re-honor your vows to each other in this way? 

Melissa: Number one, because I mean it this time. I hoped it was the first time.

Kevin: That’s good.

Melissa: Now after 20 years, I mean it.

You’re both passionate about supporting Black designers, Black brands, and vendors of color. How are you incorporating diversity into your second wedding?

Melissa: If it’s up to me, I’m trying to find a Black designer. Kev’s suit will probably be by a Black designer. My creative team is Black… We are very intentional about supporting Black brands but also we support Black brands in the same way that you may go to Target or Walmart. We do it because that’s just the nature of how we operate and do business. At this point, we don’t always have to go out of our way to support Black businesses. Black businesses are in our network.

Will you be including any cultural elements in your vow renewal ceremony?

Melissa: Like Black American culture? Yes. The Electric Slide probably will be playing.

Are the kids going to participate in the ceremony? 

Absolutely. They’ll be the only ones on the stage in addition to us.

In 2024, what can we look forward to from you two? Do you have any exciting plans, trips, or updates that we can support you both in? 

Melissa: Kev was recently announced as the new Co-Host of TBS’s ‘Friday Night Vibes’ Revival with Nina Parker airing on Jan. 5 at 8:00 pm ET/PT.

Kevin: Stay tuned. Stay tuned. 

Stay up to date on all of Kevin and Melissa’s upcoming projects by visiting www.kevonstage.com and www.mrskevonstage.com.

Vendors:

• Couple: Kevin and Melissa Fredericks (Mr. and Mrs. KevOnStage)
• Planner: CM Events and Design
• Photography: Kareem and Sandy Virgo of REEM Photography
• Videography: Unleashed Vizuals
• Makeup: Darien Isaac
• Nails: Queenie Nguyen
• Hair: Greg Gilmore
• Floral Artist: The Hidden Garden
• Wardrobe Stylist: Germanee G. of GG & Co Styling Firm
• BTS Coverage: Kait Elizabeth
• Executive Assistant: Courtney Williams
• Kev’s Custom Suit Designer: Grayscale
• Venue: Malibu Garden Estate in Malibu California